Why is there Complexity in Human Relations?

Mayanarawi, Itedal these are the kind of things we usually ignore.
In any relation we deliberately increase the expectations for the other person. I believe every relation has and should have some distance whether its respect, love, affection, care etc. We fail to control our feelings in the start and then it becomes difficult to keep up with the same attitude.

There is a couplet by faraz I cannot remind it exactly, tried googling too...anyway it says something like this. Jab mil rahi thi mohabbaten tu ehsas na tha, k ye mohabbatten lotani bhi paren gi. So if someone gets very close to you, or cares about you they expect the same care\love\respect back.
There are other dynamics too.
Things get better as you get better (older)

I totally agree with Osama Shah here. Most of us long for closeness and care from human beings and find peace if they are around us knowing there is someone to protect us and be there for us. Sadly, the 'distance' part (nicely explained by Osama) is either not thought about or taken wrongly as if not enough emotions/affection exsit/exists ...

When we all know that at one stage in our life, we are supposed to 'detach' ourselves from others (as no one is here to stay), then why 'attach' ourselves to such an extent that life after loss of someone (be it death or a break-up) gets out of control and unbearable? It is not always easy to control your emotions, but it is the orientation that matters and that very orientation is perhaps more focused on 'relationship' with human beings than with Allah.

Different kind of people expect different things. Expectations are mostly there. It's the definition we all give to our life, the understanding of what we actually want - what we expect from life, from others and from ourselves that leads to different reactions. If we decide that life is all about being happy, then we will try to be happy? If we, however, say that happiness is only temporary, satisfaction is the key to a peaceful life; then, we will perhaps be looking at things differently as well. Can we always keep someone happy? Are we supposed to keep ourselves happy? What exactly is happiness? Who gives us that happiness? How many of us try so hard to keep people happy that sometimes we do not even realize what wrong we are doing/have done (when it comes to religion)?

What I mostly do is I Alhamdulillah try my best to be there for others, but I do often try to make sure that whatever I am doing, I am primarily doing it in order to please Allah. Try to maintain a certain distance, so that people don't expect way too much from you, but still be open enough that you do not miss the possible reward you can get from doing good and pleasing others and by doing so, pleasing Allah. Also, try to have a discussion with people close to you (or for that matter anyone), and make sure your understanding matches with theirs and even if it does not - make sure they at least know what you value and what you are all about - that is, what they can expect from you and where they shall not.

All the best!

-I think relationships goes wrong or become complicated when people start to "demand", Expectation is something minor, we all have them from our loved ones and that sorta ok, if not getting the love back but one can expect to be appreciated for the love and care he/she is showing, and thing go wrong when the demands are not fulfilled. yeh kyu ker dia? aese kero, wese kero .. Arghh :P

-I heard somewhere, "you have to be happy with yourself alone first if you want to be with someone else in your life" but we are so much to into others that we dun find time to our ourselves.

-Space is any relationship is as imp as communication, at times I wonder why don't people get bored with each and other? how do they depend on each and other so much? they dun hv their own lifes?

-And what Osama said is totally right, Balance is missing from our lifes/selves if we keep a balance in anything, it gonna go straight always.

relationships.. complicated :S

maybe i am a baby, i didnt see no relationship complicated. ever visited an office, and missed being emancipated. ever seen a body, lying on a road evicerated. or in a sports competition, got your joint dislocated or after an exam result, got your hopes debilitated. ever found child in the dark, with his fear articulated or an old man in a hospital, with his life greatly depreciated. wll if you say so, probably relationships are more complicated

I think when people starts considering self interest, the relations become complex.